A Message ~

In life we meet many new people. Some become just a know counterpart , some become 'just friends', some become close, and some are just the 'best'. My mom (as every other mom does) had always preached me to do good, be a noble person as my name suggests : ) , and I always try to live up-to it. 

I don't know when it started or grew rather .. but my love for J (Jesus (j) as I call him) evolved. I was l'ill gurl, when I started to talk to him whenever I was alone. I got fascinated by his teachings and his great quotations. One of which I always remember "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do". This line changed my way of living and made me a less of a tangled person, as I would state :D. And as my mom would say, I respect my own religion gods too but 'J IS SPECIAL' , even though I dont know much abot him or his teachings : )


So, J am thankful to you for all the love you are 'showering' on me : ). I love you infinitely more,as earlier, than ever  [<3]


God bless

She is ..

She's beautiful, She's fragile, 

She's just another full of silent cries .. [which no-one hears] .. 

She's alone, all by herself .. 

Looking outt of the window where the sadness always ready to hit .. 

She's frustrated, she's all drunk, its quite late, someone please wake her up .. 

She's was once cheerful and happy but all her glee was ferried ..

Consumed by a blackened-ed-hole, 

She hates people around, feel it all a pretense ..

She's says world's all Topsy turvey for her .. 

And she doesn't understand a thing and so does the rest !
She wants to scream and shout, but can anyone hear her mourning sound ?
Some-one is being deeply missed by her pure heart, 
But that l'il missing is enough to make her tear apart !  

She's all broke and can't decide, and makes her feelings disguised ! 

She's just fooling herself when she knows that she's the only one who'll get hurt, 
Still she's obstinate to let out and share !!  

A trusting sorrow of what is unsaid, her heart still aches, [still at those things]

But still she knows, no matter what she has to go on ..      

                                                                                                                

Just  as  'She'  is ..

God Bless
    

Just One Of Those Days.

Life is truly an unexpected journey. A battle ~
Often I wonder why I think over something that can't be possible !! Well, thats what life is all about .. thinking for the unexpected, and waiting for unwanted.
* Happy Diwali *
Yea, today is Diwali, one of that festival which I love [or loved]. Everything is so cheerful this time of the year. The weather itself seems to be singing a merry song. But it is just one of those days for me that is compelling me to think. Think over something that I don't want. Its always useless to think over things that makes us sad. But what about the *Sadistic Pleasure*  we get from it ? The pleasure we get thinking about the left overs ? Yes, it is good but, bad too. I wana be content and happy that's just what I want. It isn't a big thing forgiving others but what if we don't forget at the first place ? My problems and dilemma aren't that large, just what a normal teen faces, but still thinking over in-required do hurts sometimes. I preach others to forget when I myself can't !! Is is reallii ok ?  yea, it is one of those days when I wana be lost in those days and memories.  Not worrying about anything, anyone, don't talk to anyone .. just be with myself .. feel low , listen 'our songs' and just spit out those feelings which are creating a turmoil inside of me, Killing me.. but STILL for someone's sake we have to smile, forgetting the pain we go through .. It happens. And for that reason am Smiling. Hoping to be happy from outside so that it get through inside of me too. I don't know why such days come !!?
I hope this night passes by soon .. 

Just Hoping .

God Bless

When Words Fail Music Speaks ~ ~

As the day goes by, some thing or the other happens that make me go down to some old memory lane ..
The whole day just passes by like that .. not enough time even for myself !! Well, still, some how I try to cease it from some where : )


Its true how some songs just exactly define how we feel .. at any moment of time .. in that way only these song define 'my' feelings .. coz  -  


                                                      When words fail Muzic speaks !

Fearless - Colbie Calilat

                                             

Long gone and Moved on - The Script

Away - Enrique

Goodbye - Secondhand 

                                           

I never told you - Colbie

Its not late when my mood swings .. [not much though]

   

   Calm under the waves -  Maria 

                                             

Breakthrough - Colbie

       

             Need You Now -  Lady Antebellum

                                               

Paperweight

                                     

Dream - Priscilla Ahn

Finally .. I always end up listening to 'this' song .. though its short but still it makes my feelings flip a lot, and in a way leaves my lashes wet and bring some flashback of old memories : | !!

And oddly but truly this one is special to me .

. Just No Words To Describe This Song .

. I Love It .

[In Every Way]

                                     

Simply undefined ~~

 God Bless .. 

.. A Trying Notion ..

# My one of those composition that I admire 'The most'  #


Am tired .. am drained .. its enough I can't take more strain !!
I did what I could .. but, it wasn't enough for this racing world ..
A falling stage, a reckoned state ..
Just another thing adds to the backward steps .. : (

Chained by an invisible defeat .. won't that let me succeed ??

Oh, now look what people are saying .. making funn just another stabbing !!

They don't see their own self and start to comment on what others possess !!

Am sad am torn .. those morbid days are back on the shore ..

Caught by this facade .. its hard to find the way home .. 

But with l'il strength I know I can go on .. 

The day I succeed , this day would be a reminder ..

Of all the pains I took to reach this stage .. 

Its a hard route to get to final , 
but with regular practices I can fulfill my desires ..

I just want to get to that triumphed state ..

From where I can look upon those who made my funn .. 

To wave them a goodbye of my winning thats worth enough !! 

.. I'll keep on trying ..

God Bless ..

     

An Ambiguity ~ ~

. CLUELESS .

. x .x .x .

       

Back again in the same whirlpool of thoughts and happenings !! Many a times it becomes difficult to pen down the inevitable thoughts that the mind perceives .. things, again are quite messed up these days .. sometimes it feels like the people whom I meet everyday..who consumes 1/4 part of my day, whom I have known since 11 years now .. !  .. are complete strangers to me !! well .. I guess am strange to them, in a way   : |   !! 
Everything's the same everywhere .. the same people .. the same morbid atmosphere around me (for me) .. the same houses I pass by (don't know what I wana say but there is something) , but somethings have changed so much .. 'LIFE'  moves on .. none can halt it ..    

Its a thought-full query that why suddenly someone so known, so trusted becomes fraudulent towards the ones they once loved  and don't see the pain they cause                       them everyday !!??                                 
 Can anyone be trusted blindfolded !?          

Why do someone whom we once loved exceptionally without demands deceives us  without any valid reason  !!?? 

           
   weird ..     * sigh *   

         

      Queries are meant to be answered, but some are an ordeal to pursue.. 

Well I guess I would never understand the concept of 'Expecting' ever .. its like expecting a lot from those you know, but who can never return you anything back !! Well .. still we do .. sometimes it actually becomes hard to breathe .. as in choked by some element (or by 'someone') that is most fatal one , came across..(yea, i know, it sounds like some shit movie but still it feels that way many a times)  ~ ~                                          
Some things hurts badly like stabbing straight to a sensitive part of the body .. its  easy to fall for someone .. be it any kinda relation, but to actually get outt of it ..is t the real deal .. 

People break relations so easily .. not coz they wanted to but coz someone else brimmed their mind with filth about someone they love ?!    

Is it correct ?  

     Or the person too fool enough, who can't decide the benefits of his own life ?             

 Or else he's defending himself by putting someone else's name !!?     

          Its thoughtfull and funny too that how a blossomed and cherished relation turns outt to be a disaster !!  

*phew*   

    Share, care, love, everything is done and there in that realtion, people give examples of it, envy it,    

Still - ' it  ruins '  

  I read some where - ' if you can't keep your own secrets, then how can you expect the others to do so ? '   -  true, thatt is. 

Its hard to believe that the thing you cried for days and nights .. swelling your lashes till you die crying for it .. overtook your mind with none other than its thoughts, killed yourself by waiting for it, is actually bugging you again so much now , whose importance shouldn't matter even to a point in your life !!                     

We can't change the world, just us .. but still we try .. I do feel sometimes the real sense of loss and regret, but regret is a mistake and I don't regret any of it .. coz that might be something which made me happy once so to think of it when it is all over now .. as a mistake (when it was all my choice), is just   -              

                          
      P.O.I.N.T.L.E.S.S

        

    Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next .. 'A Delicious Ambiguity' , I would say !! Its a beautifull gift, not to be wasted on filthy things, but to be cherished for the good ones !! 

So just 'try' and keep going - 

                                                                  ' still  trying '                                                                  
    *sigh*       

The one who is cheerful, always has a way to find way through the HEARTS.

GOD BLESS  : )

. A Stoяy To Tєll .

L.I.F.E.L.E.S.S

I was a carefree bird .. but you caught and prison-ed me ..
I was happy in my prison as no one could ever be ..
Life was going on like it used to be ..
I relished my time spent with you .. and never  tried to break free .. !!
Days passed by and you captured me by your lies ..
Ugly world this is .. I always thought to myself ..
 and you are my antidote to pain ..

Our bond got strong .. and the world envied it on .. and on ..

You always mended my broken feathers .. when no one could even see me ..

Betray, lies and rumors .. spread by all ..

But it didn't bother me coz you were my all ..

.. Damped Now ..

Time takes turn, as it always did ..

The l'il fragile bird's life changed into a drifting dream ..

Her wounded wings no one could fix ..

......

Resting in her monotonous cage where she fits .. 

Looking haywire .. just for people to gaze ..

Now she is replaced by another bird who is more bright ..

To turn her life into a gloomy night ..!!

She memorizes the song she sang for 'THE ONE'.. who made her damp ..

All the beautiful things said to the l'il bird, now seems to be just a pretense..

To trap her into the abyss .. That was the plan ..

Now finally she realizes that prison is truly a nightmare to reside in ..

Which leaves her with no wings to fly into the sky !! 
Days goes by like it used to pass ..
Just waiting for some miracle to pass .. !!

.. A New Life ..

A day comes by when someone passes by ..

She still griefs her old pain ..

But the new one says ..  am here to change .. !!

An affable man, he love her .. plays with her .. feeds her,

Like no-one could treat ..

Not bounding her by bars of grief .. !!

The beautiful bird is happy now like shez never been ..

And loves to sing whenever she feels .. !!

Now the bird .. clings by some values ..

To judge and trust ..

The world is a charade .. is the only crux .. !! 

.. The Free Mee ..

Well, I never thought I could write so well  : )

God Bless..

. Undefined Life .

♥ LIFE ♥

 

 Sumtymz in life we dont realize the importance of  "A person"  ..who  completely changed it.  Yes, itz true -  "People are just attached to us by their  own needs"   , but others who are reallii attached to someone in their life wont ever understand it, as they think d one they love is true n best...till they get betrayed ! well..everyone isn't the same, but all are not true either..no matter how much you trust anyone, at some point it has to break. one or the other way.  

Funny, you give your best to 'A Person' , care for them, love them, stand up for them everytime...n wen tym comes they throw 'your' trust away without realizing how much pains you took for them. No one is true. You are your own best friend.  Things change and people change. We cant change the world , their thinking or anything...its just ourself whom we can change. We should not keep anything in our heart for anyone, coz a person who speaks out anything and everything in anger is much better who accumulates things in his mind or heart. Everyone goes through a phase in their life when things seems to change beyond we imagine. I went through the same (and this was the 3rd time i can say)...at a point my mind was blank n i was completely astounded by the way things went..at first place i thought i cant cope up..but by god's grace m being surrounded by so much positive people who didnt allow me to get down ! Well.."move on" is a l'il two word sentence which I'll never forget in my  "LIFE"   ever  !!

sumtymz the beautiful relations like friendship n love seems to be a pretense isn't it ?

 

yeah it does ! 'Experience' is what we get from time...long years spent with someone so special can be broken into seconds... into so small pieces that no-one can gather back those pieces, no matter how much efforts we put in. If 'you' break a beautiful relation coz of some stupidity...then it wont ever come back..the bitterness will always be there. Well, yes, life does show us its different phases .. You cant judge anyone from the things they do or say for you, true character is known when an adverse situation occurs. Telling Some one you love them doesnot actually means they do, sum saying are mere words not from heart..and I have experienced that very well ! No one can hurt us..we are the ones who allow ourself to be wounded by the actions or words of someone coz of our trust in them which broke or any other reason. I have learnt from my mom - "NO REVENGE.  CHANGE URSELF" . Earlier when she used to tell me this, i used to look the other way n take it as a joke, as i believed in "Tit For Tat" ..but slowly i realized the power of " SILENCE " which is unfathomable...n the kind of positive energy i get now is just unimagined by me...but still i havent conquered that completely but m on my way !! n i know "I'LL  WIN" : )   !!

Just now i read somewhere 'Time takes a toll on every human relationship' ... whatever happens...happens for good...We should not demand anything from anyone in our lives thinking that person would not mind coz he/she is so close to me, coz we'll never be able to know who is what from inside except ourselves . "I AM CONTENT N HAPPY WITH MYSELF"  that's d mantra of true living. 

 So love yourself, love your god, mom-dad, n everyone and most importantly i"Always Smile" . Just one "LIFE"  is given to us by almighty. You never know when he' ll take it back, so never hurt anyone intentionally or unintentionally n always do good , coz   " What goes around, comes around " !!      

                

GOD BLESS ♥

The greatest treasure we have is the smile , no one knows what is hidden in it ! 

♥  Always  Smile  ♥